Hbee Inc.

Take look at this title -

Canada – Evil Empire Or Third World Country

Notice anything odd about it.  Is Canada evil?  Is it part of the Third World?

If you have not spent the better part of a decade or four in a vat of lysergic acid you’ll probably answer “no” to both of these questions in which case you’re left with two viable options.

1) The person that came up with the title could well win the “Most Fucked Up Person On Earth” title

2) It’s a joke.

A piece of advice – when faced with that kind of choice – go for the joke.

When you watch a video criticizing Canada for having a corn and maple syup based economy and how there are corn fields 1/2 a mile outside of major metropolitan cities – it’s a joke.

When you read something along the lines of “Calling people a buncha names isn’t a substitute for a debate, you stupid retard loser,” it’s a joke.

When you…well, I could go on for days and days.  The moral of the story is that censorship is completely random.  I’ve been part of campaigns to get videos taken down from YouTube and NOTHING has been done despite so-called “community standards” rules.  I guess baseless accusations are only allowed on YouTube if you’re serious about them.  If you’re joking, they’ll get trashed.

How many complaints does it take to get a video removed?  Beast me.  They won’t say.  It could be one complaint, it could thousands.  What’s almost funny is what they tell you when, after fifteen minutes of digging, you find the complaint form.  This is it:

We are unable to provide specific detail regarding your account suspension or your video’s removal. For more information on our what we consider inappropriate content or conduct while using YouTube, please visit our Community Guidelines and Tips at http://www.youtube.com/t/community_guidelines and our Help Center article at http://help.youtube.com/support/youtube/bin/answer.py?answer=92486.

Translation – Why did we take it down?  You’ll have to guess because, frankly, we’ve got better things to do than bother with customers.

I’m both pissed and pleased, though.  Pissed because out of the 73 BBN videos on YouTube, one of the LEAST offensive got pulled.  And pleased because out of the 73 BBN videos on YouTube, one of the LEAST offensive got pulled.

I don’t get it, sometimes

Check out the original video on Facebook.

Hbee Blatant Assholes, Culture, Grumpy Old Man, Navel (Gazing At), Poor Stupid White People, Ridicule Blatant Assholes, Culture, Grumpy Old Man, Navel (Gazing At), Poor Stupid White People, Ridicule

Before the election, my friend Roy Zimmerman wrote a song called “How Can We Lose” with the lyrics – “Everybody’s asking/how can we lose?/No – I’m serious – how?”

As with the Red Sox, I was one of the doubters who felt certain that the Democrats would find some ingenious way to shoot themselves in the foot.  And they came pretty close a few times.  Somehow, though, they managed to scrape by.  Theoretically, it should have been an actual landslide, but, whatever.

Now that we’ve won, let the losing begin!  Really, party unity is TOTALLY over-rated and we’re just going to let the Republicans walk all over us anyway, right?  So, fellow Democrats, pick up your pitchfork and jump on the bandwagon and join in the Alternate Invocation!  Nevermind that Obama just picked an openly gay for director of the Office and Management and Budget.  THAT’S NOT GOOD ENOUGH.

Again, I don’t like Rick Warren and I think Christianity is pretty silly in general but until such time as the non-religious form an actual voting block then we’re just going to have to cope with the fact that there are plenty of bible-thumpers out there and, sad to say, we should allow them to be under our big tent.

Democrats love talking about having dialogues.  I’m going to admit that I don’t always mean it.  Some people are just assholes.  Rick Warren is an asshole – there’s no doubt about it.  But ask yourself what the real significance of Warren giving the invocation.  Without googling it, who gave the last bush invocation?  Or the first one.  Did [name of preacher] who gave Clinton’s invocation stop him from getting a blow job?  Or instituting don’t-ask-don’t-tell?  bush didn’t really give a shit about the religious right.  Why would you believe that this means that Obama is a homophobe and he sold out his base?

Stop sniping.  Please.  Stop screaming about how YOUR cause has not gotten it’s perk because you didn’t vote for McCain.  There were plenty of other candidates you could have voted for.  It’s just plain passive-aggression.  Sorry.

We have the majority.  Let’s act like it and stop fracturing ourselves into infinite, almost indistinguishable sects…like the christians do.

Hbee 2008 Debacle, Democrats, Grumpy Old Man, Navel (Gazing At), Obama 2008 Debacle, Democrats, Grumpy Old Man, Navel (Gazing At), Obama

Parent-wise, I now kind of get the “do as I say, not as I do” thing.  It’s not ideal, I admint.  We, as parents, should model the behavior we expect from our kids but there’s an element of nature/nuture in the calculus.  Thusly, I’d rather teach my kids things that I didn’t learn and give them good habits that left me behind.  Some of it’s simple stuff like flossing. Some of it’s community stuff like opening door for people and not parking like an asshole.

With one child, though, I’d like to teach her that if you wait until the last minute then you get what you get so don’t whine about it.  My parents both grew up in the mid-west so nature/nuture-wise I got the stoicism gene and nature/nuture-wise I don’t think that’s a bad thing.  While it didn’t help me NOT be a last minute person, I’d like to think that when I screw up because of it I take responsibility for it.

So I get a little cranky when I read about how it technology’s fault that some kids had trouble submitting their college applications an hour before the deadline.  And I get even crankier when their parents say shit like

“This is completely unacceptable,” said Stephen Dear, a North Carolina father whose son was unable to submit his applications for more than an hour. “You have these wonderful kids who’ve been working so hard on their applications and they’re completely at the mercy of the Common Application.”

Sir – Your “wonderful kids” had more than a year to work “so hard” on his/her application as did all the other “wonderful kids” who overloaded the system with their hard work.  It’s not technology’s fault.  It may not even be your fault.  It’s your child’s fault.  That doesn’t necessarily make that kid a “bad” kid but rather than bitch to the New York Times about the failures of a system not built for the load placed on it why not sit your child down and talk to them about the virtues of time-management and planning?

And while I’m being judgmental about the NYT and luxury problems – OMG!  You’re saying you can’t get divorced because there wouldn’t be enough assets to divvy up for you to both buy comfortable houses?!  You poor, poor people!  Holy shit!  Let me start a telethon to raise the missing $300,000 out of the $2m the housing crisis sucked out of your home!  OMFG!  You’d rather live with someone you despise than rent an affordable apartment in a less-desireable section of town and shop at Johnny Foodmaster rather than Whole Foods (nee Bread and Wallet)?

Wow.  Wonder how your kids will turn out?

Hbee Culture, Flame, Grumpy Old Man, Navel (Gazing At), News Culture, Flame, Grumpy Old Man, Navel (Gazing At), News

Ok.

Sorry about  this, but here goes – When you get to the point where you have to write it “LGBT/GLBT” then you need to move to a deserted island by your self where no one will EVER make you sad ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever again.

Seriously – when does it fucking stop?  When do you stop labeling?  When do you just flip a coin, stick with the decision and stop changing what you call some thing/one just because some little asshole got bent out of shape because S/HE calls them eyeWHISKERS instead of eyeLASHES because “lashes” implies a pro-slavery/pro-capital punishment imagery.  (AND THEN, of course, some BDSM lobby cries foul because they are, ONCE AGAIN, being oppressed and their lifestyle choice denigrated.)

From Negro to colored to black to African American back to black…where next?  Seriously – where next?

Yes, yes, I understand how, as a white man I’m not allowed to comment on race/creed/color stuff because I cannot possibly understand what oppression means…outside of the 6 years I spent being called faggot, homo, queer etc in pre-college.  I’m not approaching this as a white man’s burden kind of thing.  I’m approaching this as people relating to people.  I’m looking at this from a practical standpoint.

If you want to invite me to your non-straight/non-white dance – wonderful.  I’d love to go but, frankly, I’m not sure I want to because I’m afraid that I’m going to make some kind of slip-up like saying “African American” when I should say “black” or LGBT when I should say GLBT.  I’ve gotten screwed by this before.  “Even thought everybody else here says it, you’re not allowed to say ‘faggot’ or ‘nigger’ because your honorary membership is not valid in this specific clique”.

Oh.  Do please forgive me.  How about if I just call you a fucking asshole instead for 1) needing to label yourself as different from me so you can 2) despise me for being different from you.

I’m not saying I’m perfect.  Yes, there are times I slip back into the patterns and prejudices taught to me by my parents.  I’m doing my best to not pass those on to my children.  To (as I’m led to believe) teach them that we are all equal.

What I’m saying is to stop insisting on equality by inventing new labels.

LGBT/GLBT?  How about “Paul”?  Or “Jane”?  Or “Chet”? Or “Kiwmabechocula”?

How about we toss out the labels?  Or does that make an anti-labelist?

Hbee Culture, Flame, Gay/Not Gay, Grumpy Old Man, Navel (Gazing At), Pessimisim, Racism Culture, Flame, Gay/Not Gay, Grumpy Old Man, Navel (Gazing At), Pessimisim, Racism