Despite comments to the contrary, I am staunchly anti-death, whether it’s my own or somebody else’s. Yes, it seems kind of like a no-brainer and yet, given this email from…well…as they say – don’t telegraph your punchline.
i hope you two faggots get your heads bashed in with baseball bats and your throats ripped out…i hope your mom dad, and satish get cut down by gunfire as you head out to go to the supermarket.
DAMN, you might say to yourself (or at least I hope you are saying to yourself) that’s just a little bit over the line. What kind of heinous act could elicit such blind, pro-death hatred? Here’s another clue:
you lying little disgusting fucking piece of shit.
you know what is coming your way for the lies you have told, don’t you?
do you have any idea of how many americans want to murder you?
you are probably going to get your mother, father, sister, and brother killed for being such a fucking lying little dick sucking…
YOWZA! Could this be from the ghost of Charles Bronson? An anti-war demonstrator gone bad? Dick Cheney? It’s over-generalizing to say that this kind of email could only come from an American, but not by much. After all, Americans told King George to “haveth repeated and painful intercourse with thine own personage” where as Canadians waited until 1982 to formally split from England. Plus, I’m unaware of any other culture that believes in the teaching of Jesus and supports professional wrestlers bearing John 3:16.
The question remains coyly unanswered – who wants who dead? Let’s go to the full quote
i hope you two faggots get your heads bashed in with baseball bats and your throats ripped out for murdering natalee holloway. [emphasis added]
AH! Of course! Wait. You don’t know who Natalle Holloway is? B-b-but so many Americans want her uncaught, untried and unconvicted murder(s) dead! How could you have missed one of THE MOST IMPORTANT STORIES EVER?
How can you be more interested in thousands of dead American soldiers sent to Iraq on false pretenses than one dead prom queen? You selfish, heartless bastard.
If any of the pro-Natalee forces that stop by here on occasion to wish death upon me and my family (all with the full blessing of Christ, I’m sure) would like to step up to the plate and denounce this kind of email, please, be my guest. My sense is that no one will.
It’s not George Bush or Hillary Clinton or democrats or republicans or God or Not-God that harm America, it’s these non-issue androids that keep Nancy Grace and Greta van Sustern on the air to spread non-information death porn for these useless, myopic skidmarks to jerk off to. These are the people that write letters to People Magazine protesting the voting on American Idol but can’t get up off of their asses to go to the polls.
I’m gonna give this one more shot –
Dear Natalee Holloway Death Groupies –
Instead of threatening the lives of people you’ve never met over the death of a girl you’ve never met, why not gather your vast millions into a new political party – The Natalee Nation. Your new party can easily sweep the House, the Senate and the Presidency in 2008. Once this is done, you can pass the Prom Queen Protection Act which allows you to kill ANYONE suspected of murdering a white, upper-middle class girl without benefit of due process. Only then can we all feel safe.
I’m am more than willing to host www.killfornatalee.com on my server. Please contact me.